Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

Yes. I have ADHD.

I was diagnosed. I was put on meds. I took myself off of them. And, I started developing strategies to not just compensate — but, to channel the energy and thrive.

ADD/ADHD is not a disability. In fact, I feel like it is a super-ability! Here’s the thing, for years now, I’ve been a highly read columnist in Asian circles under a secret pen-name… ooooooooooo — the secrecy of it all!

Haha 🙂 At first, it was for privacy. Also, there were some cultural concerns. Nevertheless, this week, I just have some thoughts to share. It’s pretty personal. It’s definitely me being vulnerable. You may or may not agree. And, you know what? It’s okay. It’s just me sharing. But, I think that I have a fairly unique perspective on the matter. So, I hope you find value in it, and, will share it with people who may be struggling.



Ultimately, the lesson should be this: Parenting is not about what our children should be. Parenting is about who are children are; that we bring out the best versions of them. In some of these early stages where it is tough to know why kiddos are behaving certain ways, I think it’s important for us adults to remember that kids are ridiculously intelligent. They are far smarter than they let on to be. However, just because they produce the right behavior response does not mean they understand the depth behind it.

Some of this can easily cause parents to think children are intentionally misbehaving, being disobedient, disrespectful, etc. However, some of it may just be kiddos trying to figure out a consistent and acceptable pattern of social interaction.

Think about high school language classes. Hordes of students can say various things in foreign languages. But, do they really appreciate the deeper social and interpersonal meanings? Probably not. They just know how to spout out the right answer.’

I guess all this to say, I’m sharing my ADD/ADHD experience for two reasons:

  1. To share that it is but a continuum of the norm. It shouldn’t be seen as anything but that. It certainly isn’t a disability. And, it certainly should NOT be seen as an excuse. It’s just a different way your body and brain processes life. So, get used to it. Leverage it. And, move on.
  2. To share that if even a weirdo like me can “conquer” ADD, so can you.

 

Bribing vs. Rewarding

Hi everyone!

Here’ a mid-week bonus. This post was completely unplanned… BUT! I wanted to get this out there before I went down to the grind of spreadsheet glory… yay… =P

I hope you enjoy this little video blog, vlog… blab… … post 😉

PS. Keep an eye out for tomorrow’s TBT post on Childhood Development & Speaking. When will they EVER talk? Then… when will they… clam up. LOL!

Sneaky Baby

So, my kiddo is a total sneak. He can ninja step all super quiet when he’s trying to get into areas he’s not supposed to. And, he can Jedi Mind Trick people into doing things he KNOWS is against the rules.

Example: One time, my parents came over for a visit and he decided that he wanted to divide and conquer. He separated out one of the grandparents from the group and led them into his room. In his room, a line of flags are hung up in the middle of the ceiling space which were the same flags from his 2nd birthday party. And, I’m sure you’ve guessed it, he likes to hit and slap the flags… until the line breaks and the flags fall.

He knows this is NOT acceptable. However, he’s always able to get someone into that room, have them pick him up, hoist him upwards, and give him the range he needs to smack those flags.

flags

He is a total sneak!

And, it’s incredible because it doesn’t stop there. Many times, he’ll get his hands on remote controllers and/or our cell phones. He also knows he isn’t supposed to play with such things. When we catch him, he suddenly extends out the “toy” to us — as if he’s giving it to us.

“Look! Look what I found for you, mom & dad. I was just giving it to you in immediate and present time!” — Sneaky Baby.

It is a total crack up. And, the thing is, he is 100% cognizant of what he is doing and why. It is hilarious when we call him out, too! He shakes he head, says “No.” all matter of fact, then runs away. LOL! Of course, then there is when he is so guilty and he knows it, he throws whatever object it is that he hijacked… dashing it across the floor.

*Sighs*

Once, these were our smartphones… 🙁

Then we got replacements & he did the same Thor-like-smashing-thing. Fortunately, this time, I had a GREAT case on it… Hint-Hint: Product Review to come: Galaxy S5 Case, Spigen Tough Armor Case for Galaxy S5 – Copper Gold (SGP10764)

Any way! There are other ways he’s a total sneak. Primarily, when he’s quiet. You know that phrase: “Silence is golden, unless you have a toddler — in which case, silence is SUSPICIOUS.” None could be more true than in the case of my boy. When he’s quiet, he is inordinately getting into some kind of trouble. Whether this means he’s making a mess of our blinds, trying to break into the entertainment center, figuring out the exact frequency of pulling on the door to unlock our very painstakingly installed childproofed kitchen drawers.

The most entertaining part in all this is how he runs away when he knows he was caught RED HANDED. It’s this silly giggle and dash for freedom, knowing that we are coming after him! After all, he is still a kiddo. He’s not even 3, we’re not making full conversations with him, and even if we were, there’s no guarantee that just because he is able to reciprocate verbally — that he also has a full adult understanding of what he’s even talking about. Kids are smart. They know how to respond favorably. But, being able to respond and knowing the depth of what that response means are two very different things.

As long as he’s a kid, we’re always going to treat him that way. Toddlers may seem like little drunk adults; which means, we should be treating them that way. They are out for fun, for laughs, and for love — we can’t expect them to be mature… only to be what they are: Toddlers.